Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
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