Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
Randomize
