It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
