The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
tell me about the fingering
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