i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Randomize
