My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Randomize