just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
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