Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Randomize
