Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
Randomize