my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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