You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
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