Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize
