Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
