I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize