I wannas sexs uuuuu
Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
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