There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
Randomize
