TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize
