Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Randomize