In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
