I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize
