I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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