And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
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