I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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