She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
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