so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Randomize
