I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Randomize
