is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
I deserve to be covered in dicks
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
