2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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