You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Who did Billy Mays play for?
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Randomize
