She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
Randomize