you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Randomize