Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
not ubering you a puppy
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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