It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I believe in your delicious
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
