You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
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