we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
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