Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Randomize
