we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
