What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
