yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
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