...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize