I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
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