dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize