someone get that fucking seahorse.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
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