wakey wakey hands off snakey
where am i from again
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
