i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Randomize
