do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
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We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
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