He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
