just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize
