I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
oh god the rape fog is back!
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Randomize
