He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
No subtext here. People are naked.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers