I swear she didn't look like that last week.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
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