if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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